Working with Transition Teams
How do you get your rebellious, defiant, troubled teenager to agree to attend a residential boarding school?
One of the questions that I hear the most from parents when they are considering enrolling their child into a program is,
“What if they refuses to go”?
“How can I get my child to boarding school, if he won’t even go to school, counseling, or come home? She refuses to even get in the car with me to go anywhere let alone agree to go into a residential program that we have chosen for her.”
The truth is that when parents are at this stage, their kids have usually been in refusal mode for a long time. Getting their teen to agree to do anything has become nearly impossible. The last thing they want to do is leave their environment where they are in control. By definition, an out-of-control teen typically comes and goes as they please, smokes weed/cigarettes, and plays video games for hours on end. They have not gone to school and have not followed any rules..
Troubled teenagers don’t believe there are any issues. In fact, they usually believe that if there are any issues, it’s all their parent’s fault for not understanding them and letting them make their own decisions.
Transition Teams Help Parents Transport Troubled Teenager to the Residential Treatment Program
The answer to the question is to hire a transition team. They come directly to your home, pick up your angry or rebellious child and take them to the residential program. It may seem extreme, but it is the easiest and most compassionate way to get them to their new campus.
The transition team usually consists of a minimum of two agents, one male, one female if your child is a girl. If the circumstances require it, they will add a third agent. They will come in, talk with your child and let them know in a very firm but compassionate way that they are going to a new school in a different state (usually). They need to come with them. Almost every time, there are no issues because your child will be very surprised and a bit scared about what is happening.
What to Expect from the Transition Team?
You, as the parents, will not be in the room when all of this happens. It usually only takes about 10 minutes to go from the house to the vehicle. You will be able to say goodbye if your child is cooperating. If not, they will drive off and get him calmed down. That really is all it takes. Kind of like daycare drop-off when they were three. Once the parents are no longer in sight, they calm down.
The team will either drive the entire way, depending on the school’s location, or fly. Either way, they will stay in constant contact with you and the school during the whole time.
While the team is transporting your child, they will coach and work with them to understand why you were forced to make this decision and how difficult it was to make.
How Will the Transition Team Agents Respond to My Defiant Teenager?
The transition team will explain that it was due to all the poor choices that your child made that caused this. Therefore, it will be due to their choices that will get them back home.
The transition team will calmly explain, in detail, the program that they will be in and what to expect. So, that by the time they arrive, your child will be well-informed and educated about their new school.
It’s not to say that your teenager won’t be angry, but at least they will be more informed. Most of the time they are completely in compliance and understanding by the time they arrive at the campus.
I had to make this same decision with both of my kids that went into a program and in hindsight, it was the best decision I’ve ever made. Not to say that there weren’t big challenges while on this journey, both emotional and financial, but the rewards ended up being priceless.
If you need help finding a transition team to transport your out-of-control teenager to a therapeutic boarding school or residential treatment program, contact me to schedule a consultation.
I work with several transition teams that can help you and your teenage child. I can explain how it works, the associated cost and help you by scheduling the transport for your out-of-control teenager.
